Crocodile Love

Perhaps the Nation could help us settle a dispute.

(Digression: By "us" we mean "we and WOS," not the royal "us" we so commonly employ. EOD)

WOS is troubled by something she sees all too often in movies she watches all too often. Movies like "Lake Placid 2" (2007).

(Digression: You know you're in trouble when a sequel doesn't even bother to use Roman numerals. EOD)

In these cinematic tours de force (tour de forces?), two central characters generally are set up to hook up by the end of the movie: usually the rugged sheriff type inevitably played by Bruce Boxleitner or John Schneider (or their ilk) and the hot herpetologist played by some nymphet half his age. Hey, more power to 'em, the point is this: At the end of the movie, just after (spoiler alert) the monster crocodile has been butchered by the quick thinking crocodolologist with a machete and a hollowed out log, she and the sheriff (or wildlife expert or state trooper whatever) finally give in to the seething sexual tension that has been burbling just below the surface for the last 90 minutes or so.

WOS finds this unlikely.

(Digression: Yes, THIS is the part of the movie she finds "unlikely." EOD)

She thinks the characters might hug, perhaps collapsing in each others' arms in a moment of mutual relief and emotional support. Making out, though? Not likely. We, on the other hand, disagree. We find these endings in keeping with the classical motifs of comedy/romance: The stories must end with weddings, symbolizing rebirth, fertility, regeneration. Making out is not the same as a wedding, but for the purposes of B-movie horror, it seems appropriate. All we need are some young girls dancing around Boxschneider and herpetologist, strewing rice and flowers upon the ground for the image to be complete.

What's your opinion? We'd like to know.

(Image from shockya.com)