Welcome!

Thanks for stopping by! If you like what you read, tell your friends! If you don't like what you read, tell your enemies! Either way, please post a comment, even if it's just to tell us how much we suck! (We're really needy!) You can even follow us @JasonBerner! Or don't! See if we care!







Saturday, April 6, 2013

Saturday

I've spent all day running about and getting very little accomplished.  Today's blog post is a metaphor for this situation.

See you tomorrow.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Besides, a Computer Will Never Replicate My Sarcasm

Big news out of Massachusetts, a joint venture between MIT and Harvard has led to the creation of educational software that actually reads and offers instant feedback on student essays!  "The software uses artificial intelligence to grade student essays and short written answers, freeing professors for other tasks."  According to the article, though, not everyone is pleased: "[C]ritics of the technology have tended to come from the nation’s best universities, where the level of pedagogy is much better than at most schools."

OK, first of all, fuck you very much.  The quality of pedagogy at the nation's "best" colleges and universities is often of dubious merit, as superstar professors are recruited as much--strike that--more for their name recognition than for any inherent ability to teach.

Second of all, "freeing professors for other tasks"?  What other tasks?!?  Last time I checked, responding to student writing was basically the job description--half of it, anyway.  As tedious as it sometimes is, reading a student's work is the only way for a teacher to understand whether a student is truly grasping the material.  Particularly in writing classes, of course, but in all manner of other subjects as well.  And frankly, the individualized feedback I provide to my students comprises at least half of the instruction I provide.  Class lectures allow me to convey broad concepts, but only by carefully examining a student's syntactical idiosyncrasies and logical development (or lack thereof) can I or any writing teacher offer a complete educational experience.

Free us up for other tasks? No thanks.  I'm perfectly happy being "burdened" as I am.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Just Another Day at Solipsist Central

SOLIPSIST: I've been working on a new catch-phrase.

WOS: Oh. . . kay. . . ?

SOL: Ahem. . . (Broad, farcical Italian accent) 'Don' a-blame me! I'm-a just the weeendow washer!'

WOS: What. . . Why. . .?

SOL: Pretty good, huh?

WOS: No.

SOL: But it works with any situation!

WOS: What the hell is wrong with you?

SOL: Don' a blame me! I'm-a just the weeendow washer! . . . See?

WOS: You're an idiot.

SOL: I know.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

I Think I See What You're Saying. . .

Over the last few days, as I've dealt with moving-related issues, my posts have gotten shorter.  I've noticed that this has not led to a decline in readership.  If anything, I've noticed a slight uptick in the average number of pageviews.  So, if I am interpreting this correctly, I am writing for a group of followers who don't much care to read.

Good to know.

Here is a picture of a wombat.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Preparations Continue

Today I arranged the cable/phone/internet package at the new Solipsist Central.  The best part?  The stuff is going to be hooked up before we move in.  I take an inordinate amount of comfort in the fact that I theoretically won't miss a single episode of "Doctor Who"!  Is that pathetic?  Or endearing?  I'm going to go with endearing.

Monday, April 1, 2013

Note the Date

I'm pretty broken up about Major League Baseball's Opening Day.  Pretty much everything that could go wrong did go wrong.  The Yankees--the NEW YORK YANKEES--lost to the hated Boston Red Sox.  And, to add insult to injury, the Mets absolutely clobbered the San Diego Padres.  All I can do is drown my sorrows and hope that tomorrow brings a brighter day.

Sob.

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Game of Accents

Tonight, "Game of Thrones" (probably the second best show on television) returns.  The show features something truly unique in the realm of modern television.  I speak neither of dragons nor of gratuitous nudity, but rather of the truly unique sight of an American actor cast in the role of an Englishman!  (Well, OK, strictly speaking a Westerosian, but same difference, really.)  Ever since Hugh Laurie first brayed his way across the screen in "House," American television has been inundated by Brits with the uncanny ability to do perfect American accents.  Did you know all of these performers are Brits or Aussies: Damian Lewis ("Homeland"), Andrew Lincoln ("The Walking Dead"), Rose Byrne and Anastasia Griffith ("Damages"), Joseph Fiennes ("American Horror Story").  Why isn't Congress taking up the cause of American actors displaced from juicy roles by classically-trained British interlopers?

At any rate, thank God for Peter Dinklage, who appears to be the one American actor deemed worthy enough to make the reverse trans-Atlantic crossing.  And it's not just some token role, either.  How good is Dinklage, who plays the Machiavellian dwarf, Tyrion Lannister (also probably the second best character on television)?  He's actually seven feet tall!  You go, Peter!  USA!  USA!