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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Would You Drink This?

Saw a commercial last night for "Joint Juice" that starred Joe Montana.  I guess now that the 49'ers are back in the Super Bowl, Montana can emerge from the semi-obscurity he fell into sometime over the last ten years.  Long gone are the days when we could scarcely turn on the TV without seeing Joe endorse everything from soda to feminine hygiene products (or so it seemed).  Now, though, the Hall of Famer is reduced to hawking "Joint Juice"--which is not AS depressing as Jamie Lee Curtis shilling for laxative yogurt but close.

I'm not sure I could bring myself to willingly--even eagerly--imbibe something called "joint juice": I can't shake this image of a massive factory floor lined with vats of synovial fluid all ready for bottling and shipment.  One improperly pasteurized batch'll probably lead to a massive outbreak of kuru.  And then the commercial goes on to talk about how "Joint Juice" is chock-full of glucosamine and chondroitin--like that's supposed to make it more appetizing.  I'll continue to maintain my joints the natural way, thank you very much: Massive steroid injections behind the kneecap.

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