Four

Let's see how many random bits of silliness the Solipsist can dash off before he's interrupted by a student or bear attack!

1) The rumors are true! Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and US Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton confirmed today that they will be co-starring in a Broadway revival of "Fiddler on the Roof." At their press conference, the political powerhouses wowed the assembled journalists with an impromptu performance of "Do You Love Me?":

2) If someone has a "mild" case of Tourette's Syndrome, does that mean their scatological outbursts are confined to "Shucks!," "Golly!," and "Fiddlesticks!"?

3) Dig the punctuation in that last section!

4) It's a guy thing:

Generally, complaints about public restrooms are the province of the fairer sex, but we men have to deal with something, too: Insufficient Urinal Spacing (IUS). You guys know what I'm talking about: IUS occurs when the facilities are placed so close together that you really can't avoid touching the fellow next to you. Generally, such touching can be confined to elbows, but who wants to (literally) rub elbows with a micturating male? It drifts dangerously close to Sen. Larry Craig (R-Gomorrah) territory. We say, if you're not going to provide actual physical dividers, keep urinals at least one foot apart!

Uh-oh, here comes a student!

Note: An earlier edition of today's post incorrectly identified former Senator Larry Craig as "R-Sodom." We regret the error.