Say this word: Pakistan.
If you're like most Americans, you probably said, "PACK-uh-STAN," the first syllable sounding like the thing you carry on your back, the last sounding like the first name of Oliver Hardy's comedy partner. If, however, you pronounce it correctly, i.e., the way people from Pakistan pronounce it, you said, "PAHK-ee-STAHN." Of course, if you, as an American, do pronounce it properly, you probably get some strange looks--like you're trying too hard. . . . or belong to an al-Qaeda sleeper cell.
Years ago, a sketch on "Saturday Night Live" featured performers discussing upcoming football games. The announcers talked about how the 49'ers of "Sahn Frahn-SEES-co" would be playing the Denver "BROHN-coss" and about their favorite sportscaster, "Bohb COHS-tahss."
Why is correct pronunciation a source of humor? Or even suspicion? Of course, it's partially garden-variety xenophobia, the fear of the outsider, the uneasiness aroused by that which is different. It's also related to the anti-intellectualism that sneers at people who go out of their way to use "whom" correctly. But is there not also something frightening in the idea that correctness must fall victim to conformity? Down that road lies demagoguery.
So the next time you perk up at the sound of someone saying "ee-RAHN" instead of a nasal "eye-RAN," think about offering praise instead of burial.
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