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Wednesday, November 11, 2015

In Which We Review the Republican Debate

So, let me get this straight: At last night's Republican debate, Donald Trump argued that no increase in the minimum wage is necessary because wages are "too high."  At the same time, the tide of illegal immigration must be stemmed and some 11 million people deported because, as Ted Cruz claims, these illegal immigrants are "pushing down American wages."  In other words, restricting immigration will raise the wages of American workers, who are already overpaid.  I'm so confused.  Not as confused the masses of red-state blue-collar workers supporting billionaire Donald Trump, who apparently thinks that they--the workers--are paid too much, but confused nonetheless.

Also from the debate, according to Marco Rubio, America needs "more welders and less philosophers.”  As Stannis Baratheon would surely point out, what we need are "fewer" philosophers, but aside from that Rubio is absolutely right.  America must reduce its well-documented glut of philosophers!  Why, one can't swing a dead cat--or, if you're a Schrodingerian, a dead and alive cat--without whacking a philosopher in the face!  And I, for one, am sick and tired of placing ads for welders on Craigslist (none of your business!) and having twenty to thirty philosophy majors show up!

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