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Monday, April 11, 2011

Literally Old

A couple of tidbits from today's paper, in case you missed them. First, from an article about converting weapons-grade plutonium into fuel suitable for civilian energy needs:
“'We are literally turning swords into plowshares,' one of the project’s biggest boosters, Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, said at a hearing on Capitol Hill last week."
No, Senator, you're not. You're LITERALLY blending plutonium with uranium to make a new fuel known as mixed oxide, or mox. If you wanted literally to turn swords into plowshares, you would need to find a surplus of swords and a craftsman skilled in the metallurgically transformative arts. Indeed, we doubt whether anyone ever LITERALLY turned swords into plowshares. How many swords would one need to make a good plowshare? And aren't there better uses for old swords? Prybars? Letter openers? Back scratchers?


Further down the page, in an article about Katie Couric's dimming future at CBS News, we find a silver lining for the Tiffany network. Despite shrinking ratings,
"Ms. Couric managed to do something unexpected: she lowered the median age for the program’s audience. After having the oldest network news audience under Mr. [Dan] Rather, CBS now has the youngest — with a median age of 60.6"
60.6! Median! Not content to rest on their laurels, CBS has determined to hold on to this youth demographic. Witness their upcoming three-part special report on Rita Coolidge.

Solipsistography
"Couric's Rocky Five-Year Path to a Likely Parting with CBS"
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1 comment:

  1. AnonymousApril 12, 2011 at 1:25 AM

    First of all, back in the old days (before even I was around) the metals needed for all kinds of projects were relativeley scarce and/or hard to come by. Hence, it was not unheard of for an army's warriors to deposit their weapons in a huge pile in the town square at the end of a war. Said weapons were then melted down and the iron used to make (among othe things) ploughshares (which were much smaller then, by the way). Granted, more often than not, it was the LOSING army's swords that were fashioned into the WINNING army's stuff, but...

    Second... RITA COOLIDGE?!?!?!

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