What a Difference a Catastrophe Makes!

Cheers to Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-eally?!?) for taking a bold stand against diehard conservative activists!  Boehner slammed outside agitators in a speech to House Republicans, lambasting them as hypocrites who claim to espouse faith in higher principles but who truly seek only to raise money and expand their membership lists.  They are, Boehner concluded, "ridiculous"!

Why the verbal tongue-lashing?  Well, Boehner is apparently fed up with the damage caused to his Grand Old Party by these unelected agitators.  After all, because of provocations from groups like Heritage USA, cowardly Republican leaders--like John Boehner--were forced to abandon their principles and shut down the government over an unwinnable attempt to defund the Affordable Care Act!  If only staunch possessors of adamantine backbone--like John Boehner--had been in charge back then!  Imagine how differently things would have turned out!

Ready for Some Football, But Not Ready for THAT

I've watched "Thursday Night Football" a few times this season, but I guess, before tonight, I had never caught the opening.  It features someone named Priyanka Chopra singing a song called "In My City":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IQCjqTZQLo

I never thought I'd say this, but I kind of miss Hank Williams, Jr.
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Just Another Day at Solipsist Central--Workplace Edition

A few weeks ago, my place of employment upgraded its phone system.  None too soon, I might add: I had had the same phone since I began working at the college, over twelve years ago.  Now I have all the telephonic bells and whistles I could ever desire: Caller ID! A speakerphone!  An online directory! Cool flashy lights!  I am as giddy as a kid on Christmas--if that kid had had a very, very sad life up to that point.

Today I received an e-mail from the head of the college's IT Department, which I'm told stands for "information technology."  Department.  The e-mail contained information about where to dispose of the old phones.  Relevant information, to be sure.  I couldn't help but note an undercurrent of sarcasm, however, as the e-mail proceeded to give detailed information about how to disconnect the old phones, should they still be connected.  I remind you: I work at a college--staffed, as you might expect, by college-educated personnel.  I questioned the necessity of a paragraph in an e-mail dedicated to an explanation of how to, not to put too fine a point on it, unplug a phone!  And then the e-mail concluded--I kid you not--"If you are not comfortable unplugging your own phone, please call the Help Desk so we can assist you."  I would pay to listen in on those conversations.

"Yes, I need my phone unplugged, and I was hoping I could get someone to help me with it.  I don't have any protective gloves, and I'm worried about getting bitten by phone-hornets."

"Hi, I tried disconnecting my phone, but I think I did it wrong, because I'm talking to you."

"I need some help with my phone.  And my shoelaces."

Maybe It's the Weather

For nearly four years now (!), I've kept up this blog on a near-daily basis.  I don't know exactly how.  Many was the day--perhaps you could tell--when I truly had nothing to say.  And yet I managed to crank out a paragraph or to in order to say it (nothing, that is).  A dubious achievement, to be sure, but an achievement, nonetheless.  Lately, though, I've slacked off.  Very few of my recent endeavors have risen to the level of acceptability--not much I would consider placing in any compilation of the Solipsist's greatest hits.

There are some things going on in my personal life, which are probably taking a toll.  Well, definitely taking a toll.  I know I'm less-focused on this blog than I might otherwise be.  I don't think, though, that this wholly explains my meager output.  Honestly, I suspect it has something to do with the weather. I generally scoff at such pharmaceutically-promoted "diseases" as "seasonal affective disorder": Sorry, but if a condition was unknown before a treatment was miraculously invented, said condition doesn't really exist.  Still, the Bay Area has been in the grip of something of a cold snap the past few days, and it does wear one down.

To be clear, Northern California temperatures cannot begin to compare to the arctic conditions across the Midwest and Northeast.  In a way, though, the relative mildness makes things worse: It's just cold enough outside to be truly uncomfortable, without being cold enough to require massive bundling or supplying such picturesque touches as snow and icicles.  The result is a general chill in the air that seeps right into the bones, making one feel vaguely fluish without, knock wood, actually suffering the disease.

My point is: Not conducive to anything resembling creative output.  I cling to the hope that this, too, shall pass soon and I'll be back to my normal loquacious self.

Mandela No Shoo-In for Hall of Fame

As the world mourns the passing of Nelson Mandela, the former South African president and an internationally revered icon of peace and humanity, a debate has flared anew over whether the late Nobel laureate deserves enshrinement in the Baseball Hall of Fame.

While Mandela's lifetime accomplishments in the promotion of human rights remain unparalleled, his lifetime batting average compares unfavorably with that of sluggers like Bill Mazeroski (2001) and Harmon Killebrew (1984), and his power-numbers are similarly underwhelming.  Furthermore, unlike fellow civil rights icon Jackie Robinson, Mandela won neither a Rookie of the Year nor a Most Valuable Player award during his career.

Mandela always displayed great plate discipline, leading to an impressive number of walks, and few will forget the key role he played toward the end of his career in helping the Milwaukee Braves knock off the Yankees in the 1957 World Series.  Still, the fact that he never finished higher than third in any race for a batting title--to say nothing of his frankly embarrassing numbers when he briefly tried his hand at pitching (1-7, 5.96 ERA, 32 walks, 14 strikeouts)--will likely doom his chances at enshrinement in Cooperstown.

The Hall of Fame Veterans Committee will consider Mandela's bid for membership, along with the posthumous candidacies of the Yankees owner George Steinbrenner and players' union director Marvin Miller.