Just Another Day at Solipsist Central

WOS: What IS arena football?

SOLIPSIST: Well, it's, uh, it's football that's. . .uh. . . that's . . .

WOS: That's played in an arena, I figured that much.  But what's the difference between arena football and regular football?

SOL: Well, I know that it's played on a smaller field. . . and it's a lot more high-scoring usually. . .and I think there are no real sidelines. . .or punting. . .

WOS: OK.

SOL: And I think the players have to bounce the ball. . .

WOS: What?

SOL: And fans are not allowed to do "the wave."  Umm. . . and, and, and, uh. . .

WOS: OK!

SOL: And the cheerleaders are all Danish.

WOS: Yeah, OK, I'm sorry I asked OK?

(Pause)

SOL: You know what arena football players love?

WOS: What?

SOL: When people go up to them and say, "Do you know any REAL football players?"

WOS: "Are you going to be a football player when you grow up?"

SOL: "Do you play arena football because they won't let you play the real game?"

WOS: Heh.

SOL: I think arena football is to football as the Special Olympics are to the Olympics!

WOS: OK, that's enough.

SOL: Did I take it too far again?

WOS: Yeah, kinda.