Just Another Day at Solipsist Central--Workplace Edition

A few weeks ago, my place of employment upgraded its phone system.  None too soon, I might add: I had had the same phone since I began working at the college, over twelve years ago.  Now I have all the telephonic bells and whistles I could ever desire: Caller ID! A speakerphone!  An online directory! Cool flashy lights!  I am as giddy as a kid on Christmas--if that kid had had a very, very sad life up to that point.

Today I received an e-mail from the head of the college's IT Department, which I'm told stands for "information technology."  Department.  The e-mail contained information about where to dispose of the old phones.  Relevant information, to be sure.  I couldn't help but note an undercurrent of sarcasm, however, as the e-mail proceeded to give detailed information about how to disconnect the old phones, should they still be connected.  I remind you: I work at a college--staffed, as you might expect, by college-educated personnel.  I questioned the necessity of a paragraph in an e-mail dedicated to an explanation of how to, not to put too fine a point on it, unplug a phone!  And then the e-mail concluded--I kid you not--"If you are not comfortable unplugging your own phone, please call the Help Desk so we can assist you."  I would pay to listen in on those conversations.

"Yes, I need my phone unplugged, and I was hoping I could get someone to help me with it.  I don't have any protective gloves, and I'm worried about getting bitten by phone-hornets."

"Hi, I tried disconnecting my phone, but I think I did it wrong, because I'm talking to you."

"I need some help with my phone.  And my shoelaces."

Training Day

Today, we received training on our new telephone system!

I'm glad we can finally get rid of those old Roman-numeral keypads.  No more dialing ix for an outside line!