No, we're not referring to the best-selling pseudo-self-help book of the same name. And we're not even going to link to it on Amazon.com. We may be a shill, but we have our standards.
We are, however, referring to THE secret, the simple answer to many of society's problems. It can even fit on a t-shirt:
Stand right, walk left.
That's it! Simplicity, itself.
We are referring, of course, to proper escalator etiquette. As an inveterate New Yorker (though displaced Westward), we experienced firsthand the warm karmic glow when this rule was followed. As we strolled casually leftward up a mammoth escalator at Lexington Avenue and 53 Street, we could even spare a truly un-New Yorker-like grin for the considerate folks who had decided to relax and enjoy the ride on the right. Conversely, when this rule mwas flouted, when louts lounged on the left, willfully ignoring the baleful stares of frustrated climbers backing up behind them, a miasma of ill will enveloped us all. The day was not off to a good start.
Because the moving stairway is a microcosm of society, where people can choose either to coexist peacefully, to cooperate in the most fundamental way possible--by not impeding the fundamental desires of their fellow citizens--or to obstruct their fellow men and women through a meaningless display of dominance for its own sake.
Stand right, walk left, folks. It's the only secret you need to know.
We are, however, referring to THE secret, the simple answer to many of society's problems. It can even fit on a t-shirt:
Stand right, walk left.
That's it! Simplicity, itself.
We are referring, of course, to proper escalator etiquette. As an inveterate New Yorker (though displaced Westward), we experienced firsthand the warm karmic glow when this rule was followed. As we strolled casually leftward up a mammoth escalator at Lexington Avenue and 53 Street, we could even spare a truly un-New Yorker-like grin for the considerate folks who had decided to relax and enjoy the ride on the right. Conversely, when this rule mwas flouted, when louts lounged on the left, willfully ignoring the baleful stares of frustrated climbers backing up behind them, a miasma of ill will enveloped us all. The day was not off to a good start.
Because the moving stairway is a microcosm of society, where people can choose either to coexist peacefully, to cooperate in the most fundamental way possible--by not impeding the fundamental desires of their fellow citizens--or to obstruct their fellow men and women through a meaningless display of dominance for its own sake.
Stand right, walk left, folks. It's the only secret you need to know.
O.K. Two whings: First: SRWL started in England! We had never heard about it in the States until we went there for a short vacation. Second: If we don't leave an aisle open on the escalator, how are all those movie/tv chases (where the bad guy runs either up the down escalator or viceversa, followed by the good guy yelling "police!" supposed to occur?
ReplyDeleteThird: Since when are you such a conformist?
You know, if you fatten that up with a few dozen chapters, cute illustrations, pithy sidebars and quirky quotes, you could have yourself a bestseller. Seriously.
ReplyDelete