Blindsided

Yup, we got around to watching "The Blind Side" last night.



We tried to be open-minded, honest we did. After all, the story itself is interesting. If you're not familiar with it, the movie, based on a book by Michael Lewis,

tells the true story of Michael Oher, an essentially homeless youth, born with certain genetic gifts--enormous size, speed, agility--that make him an ideal football player. He is a prototypical left tackle--the offensive lineman generally responsible for protecting a quarterback's "blind side," and thus, on average, the second-highest paid player (behind the quarterback) on most NFL teams. Despite a deficient academic background, Oher, thanks to his physical gifts, was accepted into a prestigious Mississippi private school. While there, he was effectively adopted by Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy, who brought him into their luxurious home, helped him succeed academically, and eventually watched as he was drafted by the Baltimore Ravens.

The movie takes this heartwarming tale and turns it into. . . well, into a heartwarming tale. And therein lies the essential problem. Everything in the film is geared to pluck at the heartstrings. And even though we probably know from the get-go where the story will end (especially if we're football fans), the filmmakers miss no opportunity to drill their points home.

Case in point: At one moment in the movie, Leigh Anne (Sandra Bullock--more on whom later) is discussing Michael (Quinton Aaron) with one of the administrators at his school. His records are incomplete, owing to his transient youth, but there is some information on his various childhood test scores: He scored in the lowest percentiles in such standard academic areas as reading and IQ. But, the administrator says, he did score in the 98th percentile in one category. Which one? Protective instincts!

Get it, everybody? He's protective! What a great quality for a future left tackle! Thing is, who evaluates schoolchildren's "protective instincts"? How would you evaluate a child's protective instincts? Assess their willingness to give their lives in defense of their Tickle-Me Elmo's? We don't recall being tested for "protective instincts" as a child (although we did score in the 99th percentile for cynicism). Sure Oher, like other NFL prospects, probably underwent a series of psychological evaluations before being drafted, and we believe he would score highly in that area--we just doubt that he was tested for that as a child. But it makes for a good dramatic moment, right?

Well, no, not really.

Of course, the main reason we're watching the movie--aside from our commitment to see all the Best Picture nominees--is Sandra Bullock, Academy Award winner for Best Actress. Now, bottom line: She was perfectly fine in the movie. Whenever the wealthy Leigh Anne is confronted by some evidence of Michael's horrifically underprivileged upbringing, she looks down, looks off to one side, and photogenically pulls herself together in exactly the way you would expect an actress to pull herself together to indicate shock and dismay at receiving news of a young black man's horrifically underprivileged upbringing. The most noteworthy moment from her performance is probably the moment where Leigh Anne explains to Michael what he has to do on the football field: She explains that he needs to think of the quarterback, running back, and other members of his team as members of his own family who need to be protected. And the reason the moment works is that it's basically a comic moment, and Sandra Bullock is essentially a comedic actress. (That's not an insult, by the way: Comedy is much harder than drama.) Frankly, the movie would have benefited from quite a bit more humor.

The main problem with Leigh Anne Tuohy's character is that, by the end of the movie, you still have no idea what motivated her to bring Michael Oher into her home. Does she suffer from white guilt? Is she motivated by a near-fanatical sense of Christian duty? Is it all just a ploy to ensure that Michael, when he ultimately gets a football scholarship, will play for the college of her choice? Who knows?

In fairness, this is more the fault of shoddy screenwriting than of deficient acting. Still, a superior actress could have pulled it off. Not to put too fine a point on it, but if Meryl Streep had played the part, we would know what makes Leigh Anne Tuohy tick.

In the end, "The Blind Side" is a perfectly adequate Lifetime Movie Network film. Sandra Bullock's Oscar win is testament to the oft-lamented dearth of high-quality leading roles for women. The film's Best-Picture nomination, though, is inexplicable and may convince the Academy that it needs to rethink its decision to expand the field.