So this morning, I decided finally to go see "The Avengers" (Happy, FOS?). Unfortunately, "The Avengers" was no longer playing in my area, so I went with Plan B and saw "Magic Mike."
Yes, of course I'm kidding! (And, seriously Stephen Soderbergh?)
No, the fallback movie was "Prometheus," and I must say. . . Meh.
The special effects, of course, were terrific, and the 3-D was of the immersive variety: It pulls you in and places you into the action rather than sending things jumping out at you. And there are worse ways to spend a couple of hours than staring at Charlize Theron in a skintight bodysuit. But aside from that. . . .
I assume by this point I'm giving nothing away by saying that "Prometheus" is a prequel to the whole "Alien" saga. And therein lies the central problem with this movie. I mean, if you told people that Ridley Scott was making a prequel to "Alien," the knee-jerk reaction would probably be--and largely was--AWESOME!!!! Except then you think about it for a moment, and you realize that a prequel to "Alien" was something that you had never thought about before and, indeed, saw no point of now.
Look, as misbegotten as the prequels to "Star Wars," i.e., Episodes I-III, were, you could certainly see the point of the movies: They told us how Anakin became Vader. But I felt no such need for an origin story for the "Alien" aliens: If I had ever thought about it--and I'm not sure I ever had--I had just assumed that the aliens were out there somewhere . . .existing--as aliens are wont to do. If anything, the whole origin story somewhat diminishes them.
And then there's the whole question of the quality of the movie for its own sake. That is, if I had never seen or heard of the "Alien" franchise, would this movie be satisfying in and of itself. Frankly, no. Indeed, if you asked me, "OK, so, what happened in 'Prometheus'?" I'm really not sure I have an answer. There was very little suspense, not much action, and, ultimately, an unsatisfying ending.
Maybe "Meh" is being generous.
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