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Friday, December 27, 2013

Friday Miscellany

In their Super-Bowl winning 1986-87, the New York Giants adopted a strange custom: At the end of victories, shortly before the final whistle, team members would sneak up on coach Bill Parcells and dump upon him the contents of a Gatorade cooler.  I've never understood why drenching one's coach with icy, fruit-flavored water--particularly on wintry northeastern afternoons--was considered an appropriate celebratory gesture, but Parcells never seemed to mind, and this ritual was soon adopted by other teams.

Nowadays, you don't see many NFL teams douse their coaches anymore, but the Gatorade bath is still a fixture at the college level.  At the end of games, victorious college coaches can expect to get wet.  Which got me to thinking: As far as I know, no team has ever gone on to lose a game after its coach has been drenched with Gatorade.  A sure-fire winning strategy, then, would seem to be for a team's players to pour Gatorade all over the coach as soon as possible!  If I were ever hired as a college coach, therefore, I would insist on being deluged right after the coin toss!  Championship guaranteed!

(I believe the University of Texas is looking for a new coach.  Longhorns, call me!)

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An article on the diversity of the New York Police Department reports that ""officers hail from Albania to Yemen," to which I say, simply, Yo, Zambia, WTF?  Get with the program!

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