Emergent Biosolutions has emerged as more of a problem in the realm of coronavirus vaccine production. The company has won contracts worth hundreds of millions of dollars from the federal government to produce vaccines developed by Astra Zeneca and Johnson & Johnson. Very few doses of any vaccine, though, have been distributed because the company’s quality-control levels fall short of your average meth lab.
Actually, I take that back. Walter White would never accept such shoddy manufacturing practices.
There’ve been all manner of production snafus, most notably cross-contamination of the two different vaccines. Apparently, the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup theory of vaccine production didn’t fly with government regulators.
And while the rest of the world has become adept at basic hygiene over the last 18 months, Emergent employees still display some lapses.
I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that squirrels have taken up residence in the company’s cafeteria.
I would like to formally offer my own home as a production facility for vaccine production. Sure, I’m not the cleanest fellow in the world. Maybe I haven’t changed my bedsheets since the Million Nazi March in Charlottesville—I’m protesting! But, hey, my kitchen can’t be that much filthier than Emergent’s. And I’ll let the government rent it out for pennies on the BioSolutions dollar!
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