10. Mobile Advertising: Because when you're on the go, and away from your desktop, it's good to know that people can still try to sell you penis-enlargement medication. (And if you're reading this on your Smartphone, we want a cut of those advertising dollars!)
9. IBM: We don't know why this is "trending." As far as we know, IBM hasn't been trendy since the Reagan era. Maybe they meant "IBS"? Because irritable bowels never go out of style.
8. Cloud computing: Boy, "Trending Now" is boring today! We love the idea of cloud computing, of being able to access anything from anywhere, but we became disillusioned when we realized that just linking our iPod to our iPod was a multi-step process involving a third device (i.e., a computer) and several yards of razor wire (don't ask). Outlook for cloud computing? Partly cloudy! (Hyuk.)
7. Katie Holmes: The big news is apparently that "Bikini-Clad Katie Holmes Kisses Tom Cruise." So. . . that's still going on, huh? Would have thought the beard would be all itchy by now.
6. Betty White: Donned her bikini and kissed Tom Cruise. Then she kissed Katie Holmes. Then Tom Cruise kissed both of them and jumped around on the nearest sofa. Which belonged to Steven Spielberg. Who also kissed Cruise. Then things started to get weird.
5. Military Benefits: A spending bill denies military benefits to same-sex couples. Do right-wing zealots ever miss an opportunity to act like total dicks?
4. Cash Cab Accident: If you've never seen it, "Cash Cab" is a game-show set in, well, in a taxi cab. Unsuspecting passengers board the cab and then, after they give their destination, lights flash and bells ring, and they are told that they are actually on a quiz show. During their ride, the cabbie asks the passengers trivia questions of increasing difficulty. As long as they answer correctly, the passengers earn more money, which they get to keep upon reaching their destination. If they get three answers wrong, however, the passenger lose everything and are thrown out of the cab immediately. No word on whether the cab stops first. Anyway, a pedestrian in Canada was struck and killed by the Great White North's version of the Cash Cab. Our condolences go out to the man's family. Nothing worse than losing a loved one, except maybe losing a loved one to something so ludicrous.
3. Bieber Wedding Crash: At a wedding in Malibu, the hosts broke out the karaoke machine. Someone started singing a Bieberlieder when the Biebmeister himself burst in! Seems he had been walking along the beach and heard his own voice--which apparently has the same effect on Bieber as female chimp sweat does on a male chimp. Bieber gave an impromptu performance, leaving the audience thrilled. In a related story, the karaok company has promised to remove all Bieber songs from its catalog--you can't take any chances.
2. Julianne Hough: Because it wouldn't be trendy without a "Dancing with the Stars" shout-out.
And the number one trendiest topic of THIS MOMENT IN TIME is. . . .
1. Lamar Odom Accident: The Lakers star was a passenger in a car that hit a motorcyclist and a pedestrian. While the cyclist and pedestrian were injured, Odom went on with his journey, winning a grand total of $4,800 before reaching his destination.
The cash cab accident did not occur during taping, it was when they were bringing said cab back to wherever cash cabs stay at night.
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