You finish loading your car at the supermarket. Instead of putting your shopping cart in one of the "Please leave shopping carts here" spaces, you simply leave the cart in front of where you had been parked.
Same situation, but you wheel the cart up on a nearby median.
What about this: You're working late, and, when you leave your office, you see that the custodian has already started mopping the floors. You need to walk across the still-wet floor to leave the building.
What if you're at work and doing a legitimate, but not urgent, task. A customer comes up and asks you for assistance. What this person is requesting is really not your job, but you COULD help her with it. You really don't want to, though, so you beg off, citing the fact that you have this other work to do.
What if you decide to sleep in on a day when your significant other has to get up early?
Is feeling guilt in any of these situations proper? Neurotic? Praiseworthy? If you feel unnecessarily guilty about something, is that a sign of character, of being in tune with a higher moral plane? Or is it rather a sign of moral weakness that you feel guilty but do nothing to assuage your guilt?
We have no answers for these questions. We're curious, though, to hear how our own concerns compare with those of other Sloppists.
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Cultural Illiteracy Update
OK, for the last time, here are today's "Top Ten" Yahoo! search items, as of this writing:
10. Swine Flu: Boy, people can't get enough of this stuff, can they? We'll assume this is just carry-over from last week's Rupert Grint shocker.
9. Ted Kennedy: Well, we all know who he is. We assume he's not dead, or there would have been more news about it, so we're not sure why he's being searched.
8. MLB All-Star Game: Tomorrow, from St. Louis.
7. Neil Patrick Harris: TV's Doogie Howser. And he's also on that "How I Met Your Mother" show. Not sure why he's here.
6. Molly Ringwald: Hmm. . . .Neil Patrick Harris, Molly Ringwald. . . OH! This is "Top Searches" from 1989!
5. Blackberry Tour: Wait, "Blackberry" has a tour?!? Does it ride on a bus? With groupies? We have no idea.
4. Daughtry: "American Idol" finalist from a few years back who's actually made something of a career for himself. Don't know why he's here.
3. Butner Federal Prison: Heh-heh, "BUTT-ner." No idea. (Just checked: It's where Madoff is going to serve his sentence.)
2. LaToya Jackson: Rumor is, there IS no LaToya Jackson: She and Michael were always the same person. Michael faked his death and is now going to live out his days as LaToya. OK, we made that up.
1. Jessica Simpson: She and Tony Romo just broke up. On the eve of her (we are NOT making this up) Barbie-themed birthday party. Some people seriously need to be shot.
All right, so, for today, our score is 30%. And for the week, our overall cultural "knowiness" is an even 40%. We will, of course, strive to improve on this score. In the meantime, though, we hope that you Sloppists can tolerate being informed of less than 50% of the news that really matters.
At least we'll try to be amusing.
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